01.01.70

The new definition of sour grapes: blaming your opponent’s underwear.

Last week, Slovenian skier Tina Maze had pundits and critics mentioning her unmentionables. Maze finished second in an event in Austria, but the Swiss ski federation complained that her undergarments gave her an unfair advantage.

“It’s like doping,” Swiss skier Didier Cuche told The New York Times.

Finished laughing at the absurdity of that claim? Good.

Apparently the International Ski Federation has regulations in place regarding this. And the FIS confiscated Maze’s underwear to test it.

Maze was wearing a full-body stocking, which the Swiss protesters — soon to be known as the Occupy Underwear movement — said was made of plastic, which would give Maze an aerodynamic advantage.

The underwear passed the FIS’ rigorous testing — finally, a legitimate reason for someone to wear a Deputy Panty Inspector T-shirt. The material was deemed permeable enough to be worn in competition.

Source: Columbia Daily Tribune

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